The Trouble with Relationships… It’s INSIDE us!

Relationships are hard!  It doesn’t matter what relationship we’re talking about—relationships are hard.  A few minutes ago, we watched as two sisters collided after years of hurt feelings and pent up bitterness.  Hostility reigned in that relationship!  Years of joyful memories and glad celebrations were lost because of one moment—one decision.  What was that decision?  It was when one sister assumed the worst from the other and retaliated with hurtful words.  When we make assumptions about others, we typically assume the worst.  Why?  The answer is inside us!


If we love someone, why do we fight with them?


Why are relationships hard?  It’s because of sin!

There are six sinful mindsets that doom relationships:

  • “It’s all about me! What’s best for me?”
  • “If you really loved me, you would do the things that please me.”
  • “If I need your help, I’ll ask for it.”
  • “After all I have done for you, this is the way you treat me?!”
  • “This is not what I expected. I’m not sure this is working for me.”
  • “I don’t need or want you to tell me what to do.”

What will I have to do to change my heart?

In the following verse in Romans 8, Paul gives us a very clear outline of what has to happen for our hearts to change.

  • Verse 1 – Trust in Jesus!
  • Verse 2 – Salvation in Jesus brings new life and conquers sin.
  • Verse 3-4 – This is only possible because of Jesus’ sacrifice.
  • Verses 5 – Focus on the Spirit and God’s Word, not our selfish desires.
  • Verse 6 – Focus on the Spirit brings life and peace.
  • Verses 7-8 – We cannot please God if we focus on the desires of the flesh.
  • Verses 9-11 – Since we are ‘in Christ’ we will live for him.
  • Verse 29 – God’s purpose in salvation is to conform us to the image of his Son.





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