Finally routine

When Charlotte, our daughter, was born, Michelle wasn’t able to immediately make her way to the NICU because of some additional complications. My memory of that week strings together like a series of episodes in a sitcom. Michelle and I were genuinely thrilled with every opportunity that we had to hold Charlotte. We were looked after well by our care team and even managed to feel somewhat comfortable on the third floor of the hospital building. Under all of that joy, though, was a dissatisfaction with the situation in which we had found ourselves. We didn’t imagine spending the first week as a family of three in different rooms. Reality just wasn’t what we had anticipated it to be. Neither one of us was willing to acknowledge how intense our disappointment was to the other or even ourselves. 

On the fourth night, Michelle came back into our room, sobbing – actively trying to catch her breath. I had no idea what had devastated her. My mind raced as I considered every possibility. I wondered if she had run into a doctor on her way back from the vending machine and gotten some bad news. Michelle struggled to grit through her tears and get out, “I lost your money.”

The vending machine had eaten the dollar bill she had taken for a snack. Again, reality had failed to line up with our expectations; only this time, it had brought to the surface the culmination of a month’s worth of repressed frustration in a single moment. 

As I chased rabbits in my mind to figure out how best to respond to the situation before me, a song began to play in my head. 

When upon life's billows you are tempest-tossed,
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord has done. 
Count your blessings, name them one by one . . . 

I’m accustomed to life moving to a score in my mind – but rarely is there any real application to the situation at hand. At that moment, though, the timing couldn’t have been better. Michelle and I sat down and, for the first time, verbalized that we hated having to follow a schedule to hold our baby. We felt inadequate because we weren’t able to change Charlotte’s diapers or feed her every meal. We felt lonely because we didn’t want to lean on one another with everything going on. 

After confessing how we felt to one another, we drew out a hospital branded note pad and pen and began to make a list of all the ways that we had been blessed. Our church family had been there for us with text messages and visits. Our pastor and his family had been thoughtful in looking after us. Michelle’s doctor and the staff caring for us were incredible. The timing of Charlotte’s arrival was perfect (the exact same week I had taken off work already). By the time we had finished listing just some of the blessings in our life, we had exhausted all of the real estate on the paper we were writing on. 

After a moment of worship and prayer together, our entire outlook on the situation had changed. Be careful here. You might have misunderstood what I just described. I didn’t say that we looked on the bright side. We didn’t realize that our half-empty glass was also half-full. No. We acknowledged that God is absolutely sovereign in every detail of every circumstance that we found ourselves in—simply recognizing His sovereignty put back into perspective that all along, we weren’t pursuing our missed expectations, but rather, God’s Will. 

This week, in our study through the book of Psalms, we’re turning our attention to those that have a focus on Praise or Admiration of God. This week, my prayer for you, as you follow along in the reading plan provided at the end of this post, is that you’ll experience grounding of a worshipful perspective as you consider how to praise God in every detail of every circumstance you find yourself in. 

Week 5 Psalm Reading Plan

Here is a link to a daily Psalm reading plan that you may use as we Finalize our Routine. We have included five days of focused study with a discussion question you can use as a journal response, or to start a conversation at lunchtime with your family. If you’re up for the challenge, we’ve planned out finishing the book of Psalms in this six-week study with some additional reading that sticks to each week’s theme. 

Here’s a PDF link, too.